Ever felt discombobulated while riding?  I am pretty sure that is how I have felt the past couple of days.  I am trying to achieve and maintain collection in trot.  I know what I am supposed to be doing.  I am supposed to release my tension and relax, while using my core and activating with my legs.  I also know what I am not supposed to be doing.  I am not supposed to be tense through my arms and resort to using too much rein when it feels like my horse rushes through my aids.  Most of all, I am pretty sure that I am not supposed to be discombobulated.

The discombobulating is not only in my brain; it is through my body.  I feel like I am all over the place trying different things with varying degrees of success.  And then I simply can’t feel with my physical body whether or not I have achieved success.  I try to slow my seat, let go with my thighs, keep my hands low, look up, weight my heels, relax through my shoulders, and keep my elbows moving.  I try to use my core to lift his withers come up, and at the same time, lengthen my thigh while I put my lower leg slightly back to collect the trot.  I breath.  I try to relax my forearm and wrists . . . OMG!  This feels next to impossible. 

I am a bunch of random moving parts, each with their own set of instructions and none of them working together in cooperation.  That is what discombobulated feels like when riding.